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7

Blah blah blah Epic Rat Battles of Horror. Welcome back. Yet again. Todays suggestion comes from BackToTheFuturama86 totally not because I told him what the battle was in advance and asked him to comment a suggestion for it. Wait, what? Anyways, for our Se7enth film, we have John Doe, the psycho torturer obsessed with the Seven Deadly Sins, vs Annie Wilkes, the psycho torturer obsessed with an author and his writings, to see who's the better easily-obsessive torturer. Annie Wilkes is from Stephen King's "Misery", so... uh... that means something I guess? Either way, thanks to J1Coupe as always for the title cards (As always <3) and special thanks to Firebrand795 for allowing me to post this on the same day as his awesome season finale (WHICH YOU SHOULD GO READ RIGHT NOW PLS) That aside, let's get the battle started

Cast[]

John Doe- EpicLLOYD

Annie Wilkes- Kimmy Gatewood

Frank (Cameo)- NicePeter

Instrumental- Voices of Revenge

Introduction[]

Announcer: (0:11)

EPIC RAT BATTLES OF HORROR!

7. Annie Wilkes














VS!

7. John Doe














BEGIN!

The Battle[]

John Doe: (0:22)

Let me make myself clear, Annie, this raps a real bone crusher,

There isn’t going to be a happy ending for Norman Bates grandmother!

This a battle of sadists, my dear, and John runs this game,

Got dozens of disorders, it’s more comfortable for me to call you insane,

I’m bringing the pain to end this stain, it’s inhumane what you did to Frank,

But don’t step up to Dr. Doe, or he’ll leave this crude shrew slain,

You won’t be so jittery when I steal your victory, you’ll be history!

Light’s out, Wilkes, I bring God's will to put you out of your Misery


Annie Wilkes: (0:43)

Time to take up paper and pen, rap against this freak with no friends,

Because you ain’t no Big Jim- And THIS John Dies At The End!

Take no crap from Lex Luthor- Rap so good, makes me feel younger,

Don’t judge me with your numbers, you’re an ordinary bible thumper!

You’re no saint- All sinner, who should be punished with these lines,

Like I always say, if you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime,

But I pack the strength of a sledgehammer in more than seven of these rhymes,

And like your death back in nineteen ninety five, they blow minds!


John Doe: (1:06)

  • Deep breath

It seems you’re looking for WRATH, but I won’t cut you off,

Your lyrics are lazy, since they are the product of a sluggish SLOTH

You may LUST for a win, but I’m gonna be giving you a hard time,

When you commit GLUTTONY, since I’m making you eat my rhymes!

You are GREED-y of my skill and your greedy for my plans, Anne,

Your misplaced sense of PRIDE can call yourself my biggest fan,

Because you WISH you were me! And we call that JEALOUSY!

Your REAL sin is ENVY ‘cause you wish you could spit as well as me


Annie Wilkes: (1:27)

You’d better pray to the God you doubt because I’ll make you need a savior!

Think your countless failed marriages constitutes for your behavior?

You’re a balding shell of a man who went insane ‘cause his life sucked!

Well I’ll serve you some reality- eat it 'til you choke you sick, twisted fuck!


John Doe: (1:38)

I am supposed to trust a God is watching when rhymes like those exist?!

My wife cheat me! My mother beat me! Damn right, I’m pissed!

Think your OSCAR makes you special?! I outsmarted those bastard police!

GO AHEAD AND KILL ME!! It will only complete my masterpiece…


Annie Wilkes: (1:49)

Don’t talk back to me like that! Your rudeness and distaste is a disgrace,

But by the looks of it, somebody already mutilated YOUR face!

I’m the master- Not this bastard! You’re best torture is when you’re a rapper,

And I’ll trample you faster than the Tractor you’re named after!

Better wipe away that awful snear- Cause tonight, I’m the one they fear,

They call me the ol’ Dragon Lady and tonight, I’m feasting on deer,

Quit forcing that wraith and innocent mate into rape and let me destroy your faith,

Yes, there are seven sins in the bible, but I AM the EIGHTH!

Announcer: (2:11)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE! EPIC! (EPIC!) EPIC! (EPIC!) EPIC! (EPIC!) EPIC RAT BATTLES OF HORROR!

Outro[]

7. YOU DECIDE again














Logo horror
Tiny logo s1

Jason vs FreddyBeetlejuice vs HerobrineAlex DeLarge vs Norman BatesChucky vs Tails DollHannibal Lecter vs CupcakesManiac Cop vs The GovernorHoody & Masky vs The StrangersGhostface vs LeatherfaceCarrie vs Bloody MaryThe Ring vs The GrudgeSonic.exe vs Stay AliveJack Torrance vs Jack the RipperAo Oni vs Amnesia

Tiny logo s2

Jason vs Freddy 2Patrick Bateman vs DexterPinhead vs Pyramid HeadCoraline vs Donnie DarkoGhost Rider vs The Headless HorsemanLaughing Jack vs Captain SpauldingJohn Doe vs Annie WilkesSketchpad vs Billy the PuppetAudrey II vs Killer TomatoesKing Ramses vs The MummySmile.dog vs WerewolfSam vs Michael MyersChris Walker vs NemesisThe Witch's House vs The Blair WitchZalgo vs Cthulhu

Tiny logo s3

Jeff the Killer vs Slender ManAlex DeLarge vs Norman Bates 2Krampus vs The Gingerdead ManPale Man vs The RakeInvisible Man vs Midnight ManThe Skin Taker vs Buffalo BillSweeney Todd vs Edward ScissorhandsEyeless Jack vs The BlindedShrignold vs Mary Lou MaloneyKiller Klowns vs TwistyAuthors vs DirectorsLeprechaun vs RumpelstiltskinSCP-173 vs Weeping AngelsGodzilla vs King KongHABIT vs the BunnymanDipper & Mabel vs Billy & MandyBEN Drowned vs HAL 9000Sinister vs InsidiousRod Serling vs The Crypt KeeperThe Yeti vs Bigfoot

TINY LOGO S4

Alien vs PredatorPatrick Bateman vs Dexter 2Alice vs MadotsukiSlappy vs AnnabelleSmiley vs Evil OttoUnfriended vs The Craigslist KillerFrankenstein's Monster vs The WolfmanEmily Rose vs Regan MacNeilThe Observer vs Big BrotherPokePastas vs MLPastasSpringtrap vs Abandoned by DisneyJack Skellington vs PumpkinheadEsther vs TómasThe Purge vs Youre NextThe Bogeyman vs The BabadookSam & Dean vs Mulder & ScullyThe Midnight Society vs Children of the CornH. H. Holmes vs The Zodiac KillerHellboy vs DoomguySHODAN vs ImScared

S5 logo

Vincent Price vs MrCreepyPastaParaNorman vs Cole SearThe Fisherman vs The Gill-ManFlowey vs Happy AppyCerberus vs Scooby-DooL vs AHelena vs Reverend Harry PowellInsane Clown Posse vs Marilyn MansonThe Crooked Man vs It FollowsGomez Addams vs Herman MunsterVampire Hunters vs Zombie SlayersFran Bow vs The BaudelairesUBOA vs NosferatuNES Godzilla vs CloverfieldTony the Talking Clock vs Ticci TobyAuthors vs Directors 2Dr. Victor Frankenstein vs Herbert WestIb vs Dorian GrayBig Daddy vs MamaSy vs Frank WestUntil Dawn vs The Cabin in the Woods

Remastered logo

Jason vs FreddyGhostface vs LeatherfaceChucky vs Tails DollThe Ring vs The Grudge

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Sharknado vs JawsMonster High vs Monsters IncSerial Killers vs Cereal MascotsScary Movie vs A Haunted House

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Woman in Black vs Lady in WhiteDino Crisis vs Primal Rage

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w/ Herobrinew/ Herobrine 2w/ Eyeless Jackw/ Mulder & Scullyw/ Max Caulfield

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