Literature vs History 9: The Mad Hatter vs Deadpool

Hey dudes! April came sooner than expected (imagine this as an April Fools special :P I recently found out I would be buttfucked on that day so ye), so yeah, here's the premiere of Literature vs History, I'll try to pump these out, one every week but I want to be really proud of this second half <3 Note: This battle isn't really supposed to make much sense. Thanks to Leandro for the beautiful cover, Quagga for the beautiful art, Bran, Tkid, Jella, Left, and Alan for doing the beautiful character checks, and let's get this started!

Enjoy :D

Beat

Mad Hatter

Starts at 0:12

Lyrics

Deadpool:

What, another battle?? Yawn, wake me up when it’s over,

‘Cause I coulda sworn I already owned the Joker!

Oh sorry, never mind, I got confused, lemme explain it,

Cause Tim Burton grabbed ya both, and came in your faces!

I’ll leave no traces, when I hound you harder than a clock’s tick,

Can’t stop it! Bitch, this dude is making more news than a Mad T-kid!

Got wit so sharp I’ll slice the hare off this cunt,

And like your sequel, you can’t Weasel outta this one!

Mad Hatter:

Pleased to have you! Unfortunately, you brought nothing new to the table,

Just one trick on a pony! Tugged along by a Cable

You’re not a rapper you’re a chatter, simply sadder with patter

Try to shatter the Hatter I’ll serve this ratter splattered on a platter!

You make laughter come faster, whacker than your actor’s past,

When he snapped your chatter shut, after that disaster’s cash!

You’re incompetent, I’m stompin’ it, the only thing you can kill is Time

What direction is the nearest “go away”? Between my fingers lay the sign!

Deadpool:

I left my audience in stitches when I tore them off my mouth,

I put the ass in compass ‘cause I’ll direct Alice down south! UH!

And I’ll give sweet lovin’ to the users who are lovin’ my bars,

But do my voters wanna hear a secret? All the best people are! <3

Mad Hatter:

You destroy families because yours was broken from the start

You’re sad, winning solely for the fact your attackers tire of ripping you apart

My questions will leave your head spinning, so please loosen up!

Tell me Mister Pool, what comes twice before the goose? Duck?

Oh my lord the beauty <3

A baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire comes swinging out of nowhere, slamming into the back of Deadpool’s head, sending him flying. He scrambles around, disoriented, the bat coming down on his hand. Deadpool yelps in pain, his vision unblurring, revealing a laughing figure wearing a leather jacket

Negan:

Heh. Oh, fuck, man, you took it like a champ! Holy fuck!

And unlike a baseball bat, this tea sipping fuck has got a cunt!

With Tim Burton’s fucking cum making up this faggot’s make up,

Making up fuck shit like motherdick while I hit your balls straight up!

Fuck you Deadpool, the dick you fucking say is like my own: Perfectly fucking average

Now lemme look at you like a man, yanks off his mask HOLY FUCK WHAT HAPPENED??? :D

I don’t remember making your fucking face a waffle, ‘cause Domino’s always delivers

You get it? You get it? Aw come on! Ugh, fuck it: I meant I fucking did her.

Anyway fuckheads, I heard there was a mad rap happening so I decided to take a crack at it

To give your fans the inside story, and WHAM

Swings bat, shattering the back of Deadpool’s skull as he keeps trying to regenerate

THAT HAPPENED!

Cause I definitely ain’t insane but my sweet Lucille was getting hungry,

And like Lewis Carroll for fucking crack, I decided to go hunting! :D

Found Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Fuck, but this time I knew who to fucking pick,

The Hatta’ ain’t got nothing in his head! But the other guy he can uh… Regenerate and shit?

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Negan slams Lucille down on Deadpool’s newly formed jaw, the tongue flopping out

Anyway, Lucille’s had her fill, I’ll be back tomorrow for the other half of ya,

You both got good fucking points for the cocksucking….ta-ta.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

LITERATURE!

VOTE FOR ME OR I'LL KILL YOU

​VS!

*the sound of Deadpool getting whacked with Lucille*

FUCK

HISTORYYYYYYYYY