Neil Armstrong vs Yuri Gagarin. Dem Epic Rap Battles

The first man in space, Yuri Gagarin, battles against the famous moon-lander, Neil Armstrong to see who’s the better astronaut.

Beat[]

Intro[]

DEM EPIC RAP BATTLES!

YURI GAGARIN!

VS!

NEIL ARMSTRONG!

BEGIN!

Yuri Gagarin (0:30):[]

Let’s go! You’re astro-not gonna survive this battle

I’ll leave you outer space like what you did to that satchel

Not the thickest suit can protect you from the pain I bring

I’ll tear your scrawny ass apart, like that wedding ring

First man in space, got a smile so charming

You shouldn’t be facing me, so go back to do some farming

This is a battle of astronomy, you must’ve misunderstood

With that silver space suit, you should go get a job at Hollywood

I’m Colonel Gagarin; you’d better pay your respect

Or in the end, I’m gonna leave your space-shipwrecked

I’m gonna win this fight, my rhymes go up like a hot air balloon

But your chances of winning, ha! Now that’s once in a blue moon

Neil Armstrong (1:05):[]

Houston, we have a problem here, an alien’s trying to fight

Well, this will be an easy defeat judging from his height

Listen to my command, cause now I am your captain

So stumble back to Soviet Union, Urine Gagarin

I’m a national hero, solving the mysteries of space

While you’re on that balcony with Anna, having some air-third-base

Compared to mine, your whole legacy is a failure

On July 24 1969, I’m on every man’s paper

I’ll leave your face more scarred than that piece of curb does

Now take this fist to your face like my name is Buzz

You can’t find God? Well I’ll send you up to heaven

And after this you’re going to remember Apollo 11

Yuri Gagarin (1:40):[]

Try to rap against me; you’ll be stuck on the moon again

Because I’ll go onto your spaceship and break that space pen

Your rocket just crashed, so here’s one diss of mankind for you

Fact is, no one even knows if the moon landing is true

Neil Armstrong (1:50):[]

After Vostok 1, what have you done with the rest of your life?

Drinking vodka, hurting yourself and cheating on your wife?

This alcoholic, pathetic amateur can’t match my fame

So just step out of the arena and go back on that plane

Outro[]

WHO WON?

WHO’S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!