I've always loved this battle of a non-fictional motel serial killer vs a fictional motel serial killer.
Also, another special thanks to Flats for reading over this battle a little while back and helping me change one of the lines. Apparently one of the lines also made him laugh which he said is rare. I guess I did a good then. And another special thanks to Leandro for creating the iTunes cover a long while back.
Let's get started.
ALANOMALY RAP BATTLES
H. H. Holmes
(Starts at 0:33)
The first of the killers shall be the first in this battle.
You're a fictional little man, I suggest that you scidaddle.
Your fame comes from Hitchcock, I created my own infamy,
And when you check into my mansion, you'll feel a rage of jealousy!
A list of over 200 estimated killings and with the Devil himself as my witness,
This pitiful Fazbear Animatronic is no where near me, he cannot hit this!
Leave this to the professionals, you're a child, a momma's boy!
I'm cheating and I'm killing everyone I've ever known, just listen to my voice!
So much evil in this world, from the whores to your Nietzsche mustache.
I'm sorry, Mr. Holmes, you're nothing like Sherlock. Tell me, where's your body stash?
My names are all puns, so I'm more than just a Normal rapper.
I'll peep through your office and then when I'm finished spying, you'll be stabbed.
You've gotten too many women, sexual intercourse is sinful.
Alfred didn't bring me fame, I'm the one who made the blood-bathtub full.
When I'm through with you, I'll leave your skeleton in a cellar to rot,
Because that's much more clean than the fate your victims had got.
H. H. Holmes
If you think you stand a chance against me, you couldn't be more Psycho.
I'm ruining the life of my partners, scarring children, your level of scariness is low.
I'm a king of torture, you're a jester of a killer with an identity crisis that makes Oedipus look sane.
Call me Hitler's predecessor because I've got the gas chambers which Jew can never escape!
Like a poet, I've got the instinct for doing what I was born to do, while you dress up
As your own poor mother, with a staged suicide which I'm surprised you did not mess up!
Anything bad about my mother you say is clearly a lie.
I've known her until her death, and believe me:
She wouldn't even hurt a fly!
My film is significant, even Congress is able to understand that.
I'll take your $4,000 and use it to clean off the blood that has been splat.
I spit the calm but sick rhymes from within a motel or solitude.
I've tricked people for decades, and I've got the disses, so rude.
Alfred Hitchcock Presents the battle of Bates and Holmes,
A battle that shall be watched for decades in the televisions of all homes,
So everyone shall see what happens when I knock off your top hat dome,
And like when you were sentenced in history, you shall again hang out all alone.
ALANOMALY [logo is stabbed] Rap... Battles...
- This is the first, and so far only, non-royale battle to have each contestant have a different beat for their verses.
- This is currently Alan's favorite of his battles.