Picture a child sitting next to a projector,
(Spielberg introduces himself to Hitchcock in a way reminiscent of a movie pitch by telling him to "picture" something, which means to imagine a thought in your mind.)
Learning from your films to become a much better director.
(Spielberg grew up watching Hitchcock's films and was a big fan of his. He claims to have used what he learned from his films to make superior works of his own.)
Now picture a 3-billion-dollar dream machine
(Spielberg's net worth has been said to be 3 billion USD, and he has said he "dreams for a living". Spielberg is also a founder of DreamWorks Studios.)
Who can block bust all over your crop duster scene!
(Continuing from his previous line, Spielberg says he can "blockbust" (a play on the term "blockbuster" for large profiting films, such as the ones Spielberg makes), or beat Hitchcock and his "crop duster scene", a reference to a famous scene in his film North by Northwest featuring a crop duster nearly hitting the main character in a field. Spielberg's 1975 film Jaws has also been considered a major influence for summer blockbusters.)
Try to Duel with me, Alfred, you must be Psycho!
(Spielberg directed a film Duel. Here, he says that if Hitchcock attempts to battle him, he must be insane, or "psycho", referring to Hitchcock's famous film Psycho.)
I'll bring back JAWS and take a bite of your Lifeboat!
(Jaws was Spielberg's first major movie, which was about a vicious shark that caused panic in a beach town. Lifeboat was one of Hitchcock's earlier films about stranded passengers sharing a small lifeboat after the sinking of their ship. Spielberg says that he will get the shark to attack Hitchcock like he was a lifeboat.)
I'm Always so on top of my game! I get the Vertigo!
(Spielberg states he is always at his best, or on top of his game. The top of his game is so high up that he gets vertigo, a sensation of simultaneous disorientation and queasiness that someone gets when looking down from a great height. Always and Vertigo are also films by Spielberg and Hitchcock, respectively.)
My jet's in The Terminal, waiting for me to Murder! ya.
(Spielberg has one of the most expensive private jets in the world. He says that it is in an airport terminal waiting for him to beat Hitchcock so he can leave when he is finished. The Terminal is a 2004 film directed by Spielberg, while Murder! was a 1930 film directed by Hitchcock.)
I rock the Academy and the DGA!
(Spielberg has won three Academy Awards and a lifetime achievement award from the Directors' Guild of America, as he brags that his work is widely celebrated.)
You rock as many Oscars as that schlep Michael Bay!
(While Spielberg won several Oscars—the nickname for the Academy Awards—as stated above, Hitchcock was nominated for many Oscars under Best Director but won none, excluding a Irving G. Thalberg Memorial Award (considered an "honorary Oscar") received in 1968. Likewise, Michael Bay, a director whose films have been criticized and panned for its overabundant use of special effects, has never won an Oscar either, and Spielberg implies that Hitchcock is an inferior director on Michael Bay's level. Spielberg is Jewish, so he uses the Yiddish term "schlep" to describe Bay as giving the profession a bad name; a schlep is "someone who carries a lot of [useless] stuff".)
Next time you're filling up those jowls with three steaks and soufflé,
(Hitchcock was notoriously overweight, and he had the sagging cheeks, or "jowls", to prove it. His atypical eating habits might have included three steaks and a soufflé, which is a type of "puffed" pastry dessert. This was documented in 2013's Hitchcock, a film about his life.)
Check the trades; see me Amblin' to my next big play!
(Spielberg started up Amblin Entertainment, which is named after Amblin', a short film he directed and which has been his mark from 1981 onward. To amble is also another word for walking or moving towards. He tells Hitchcock to look at the Hollywood trade magazines to see what Spielberg will walk into next.)
I produce cartoons and make games for all ages.
(Spielberg produced several successful 1990s cartoons such as Animaniacs, Freakazoid!, and Tiny Toon Adventures, as well as successful video game series such as Medal of Honor and Boom Blox.)
You produce Jimmy Stewart making one of two faces!
(James "Jimmy" Stewart was an actor that was frequently featured in Hitchcock's films, including Vertigo, Rope, and Rear Window. Stewart had a very distinct face and often repeated the same two expressions (often scared/surprised and serious). Spielberg delivers the last part of this line doing an impression of Stewart's voice.)
Maybe next time I visit, you'll be a bit more gracious!
(Spielberg references the time he attempted to meet with Hitchcock while on the movie set of Hitchcock's film, Family Plot. Hitchcock refused to meet him, even though Spielberg was a huge fan of his movies.)
Now kiss my full moon and just bask in my greatness!
(A reference to the famous shot near the end of E.T.: The Extra Terrestrial, in which the main characters fly in front of a full moon on a bike. "Full moon" is also another way of saying "ass". Spielberg tells Hitchcock to kiss Spielberg's ass (pulling down his pants so he can do so) because he believes that he is the greater director. During this line, Spielberg and Hitchcock are shown as silhouettes, which could be a reference to the theatrical poster of A.I. Artificial Intelligence, a 2001 film directed by Spielberg.)
That was a close encounter of the turd kind,
(Spielberg directed the film Close Encounters of the Third Kind. Hitchcock redirects this title as a way to say how awful Spielberg's verse was, comparing it to feces. It also refers to how he was shown Spielberg's "full moon".)
But there won't be a pretty ending this time.
(Hitchcock refers to the ending of Close Encounters of the Third Kind, saying the ending of that movie was pretty when compared to how he will end this battle.)
Half your billions should go to John Williams!
(John Williams is known for the music on some of Steven Spielberg's most popular movies, including Jurassic Park, Indiana Jones, E.T., and Jaws. Spielberg once stated that without Williams's score for Jaws, the movie would only have been half as successful. Hitchcock says that Williams' music made the movies better than Spielberg did; therefore, Steven should split the money and give Williams his fair share of the profit. By contrast, Alfred Hitchcock's career started in the era of silent films and even his later films contain long periods of silence.)
Now brace yourself as I reveal my brilliance!
(Hitchcock tells Spielberg to brace himself, or get prepared to be outshined by his pure creativity and film-making intellect.)
I'm the master…of suspense, so intense,
(One of Hitchcock's nicknames was "The Master of Suspense". In many Hitchcock films, a score is added to scenes to add intensity and suspense to drastic moments. The chord between Hitchcock saying "master" and "of suspense" is similar to a chord from a famous scene in "Psycho".)
No defense against Hitchcock once he presents! (Ahh!)
(Hitchcock says his rapping is so good that anyone who dares to battle him will be unable to stand against it. Alfred Hitchcock Presents was a 1955-65 TV show by Hitchcock.)
My skill is enormous, orchestrate brilliant performance.
(With a boast on Hitchcock's capabilities on movie-making and a possible reference to his large body type, he also references the orchestral scores that were usually utilized in his movies while comparing himself to a conductor, i.e. an orchestra's director.)
You're more horrible than Megan Fox's acting in Transformers!
(The Transformers film franchise, directed by Michael Bay and produced by Spielberg, is often criticized for its overuse of special effects and acting. Megan Fox, a star actress in the franchise, is compared to Spielberg for both being awful: one at directing and one at acting.)
C'mon! Fish puppets and Muppets to stir the fears up!
(The creatures in some of Spielberg's most famous movies, like Jaws, Jurassic Park, and the eponymous character of E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, are puppets. Hitchcock finds this laughable.)
I squeeze screams out of chocolate syrup!
(In Hitchcock's movie Psycho, the blood in the infamous shower scene was simulated using chocolate syrup due to the film being black and white. The violence of the scene was unheard of at the time and caused many audience members to scream while watching it. This may also be a joke on how Hitchcock can even make food scream based on his weight and suspenseful directing.)
I'm the best mamma-jamma ever stood behind the camera!
(Hitchcock is regarded as one of the greatest directors in the history of cinema. "Mamma-jamma" is slang for someone who is a boss, so he claims to be one at directing.)
Damage panderers and haunt you like the last Indiana!
(A panderer is someone who tries to please others, often kissing up to people for an ulterior motive. Hitchcock calls Spielberg a panderer as a retort to Spielberg's second-to-last line, in which he calls Hitchcock disrespectful for refusing to meet with him. In return, he says Spielberg is nothing but a kiss-up, and he will damage him as he has done so in the battle. After he does so, Spielberg will be haunted like Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, a Spielberg film that got mixed reception but was criticized for its story in comparison to previous installments of the franchise.)
Cut! Gimme a Tylenol. Stop rhyming, y'all!
("Cut!" is often said by directors when they need to stop a scene. Quentin Tarantino, the director of Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill, and Inglorious Basterds, says he wants a Tylenol because he has gotten a headache from their rapping.)
Alfred, you got no style, dog. I'm the king of dialogue!
(Tarantino is known for his clever dialogue. He blasts Hitchcock first, saying that his rapping lacks style. He also calls him "dog" which may refer to Tarantino's film, Reservoir Dogs.)
There's only one movie I know you from,
(Quentin refers to the movie Psycho. Hitchcock's films were extremely influential to other directors and producers, yet Psycho is usually the only Hitchcock film modern audiences have seen, showing that Hitchcock is no longer popular. Tarantino is also a huge movie fan, so this could mean that despite being someone with an extensive knowledge of movies, he is only familiar with one of Hitchcock's.)
And I've seen more blood in the shower when I stubbed my toe in one.
(In Psycho, there is a famous scene where character Marion Crane is murdered while taking a shower, which doesn't show much blood. The scene itself uses chocolate syrup in place of real blood, which was referred to in Hitchcock's verse. Tarantino's films are known for using lots of blood. Even given this, Tarantino says he has seen more blood in a shower after doing something as commonplace as injuring his toe in it.)
You tried to fight in World War I but couldn't do that.
(During World War I, Hitchcock tried to sign up for military service, but he was rejected, the reason for which Tarantino explains in his next line.)
The British Army wouldn't let you join 'cause you were too fat!
(When Hitchcock attempted to enlist for the British Army, he was dismissed because of his obesity.)
Look it up; it's a true fact. Wikipedia that!
(Tarantino states that his previous insult against Hitchcock can be fact-checked by looking on his Wikipedia page.)
Now allow me to attack Steven the hack.
(After dissing Hitchcock for a couple of lines, Tarantino decides to switch to attacking Spielberg instead, calling him a hack, i.e. someone who is unable to perform his job very well.)
Due to War of the Worlds, a failure's what I label you.
(Spielberg directed the 2005 remake of War of the Worlds, starring Tom Cruise. It was a huge success at the box office despite generally negative audience reviews, but Tarantino criticizes him for it for reasons he elaborates on in the next line.)
It looked like some sellout bullshit Michael Bay would do!
(The above film was so loaded with special effects and explosions that Tarantino compares it to a Michael Bay work, which he then calls worthless. Tarantino also says that Spielberg was a sellout and only made the movie to make money.)
Ask anybody, "What's your favorite Sam Jackson part?"
(Actor Samuel L. Jackson has memorably appeared in several of Tarantino's movies, including Pulp Fiction, widely regarded as one of the greatest films ever made. Jackson's role in the film, a calm hitman named Jules Winnflield, is often regarded as the actor's best role out of his entire career. Tarantino says Spielberg could ask anybody about his/her favorite role that Jackson has played, and he explains the answer Spielberg would receive in his following line.)
No one's gonna say, "What's-his-name from Jurassic Park!"
(In Spielberg's Jurassic Park, Samuel L. Jackson plays the role of John Arnold, the chief engineer of the park who is a minor character in the story. Continuing from his previous line, Tarantino suggests that if you'd ask anybody about their favorite Samuel L. Jackson role, the answer wouldn't be John Arnold, but rather a character from one of Tarantino's movies, such as Jules. This is a taunt to Spielberg's choice of casting Jackson for a character that couldn't be memorable for such a recognized actor.)
The scripts that I write ain't the…cleanest, (Fuck!)
(Many scenes across Tarantino's filmography contain graphic violence and are known for their profane language. Quentin also echoes "fuck" and "dick" during this following couplet to amplify such. During this line and the next two, a mysterious figure can be seen and heard riding on a tricycle, and anticipation builds as to whom that figure might be.)
But when I grip mics, I'm the…meanest. (Dick!)
(Tarantino says that when he raps, or "grips mics," he is the meanest, implying he has the hardest-hitting raps.)
Quentin Tarantino is a…genius.
(Fans of Tarantino's films consider him a genius. This may also come from the fact that Tarantino has an above-genius level IQ of 160.)
A bad motherfucker from the wallet to the penis!
(Samuel L. Jackson's character in Pulp Fiction is shown with a wallet labeled "Bad Motherfucker", an accessory owned by Tarantino in real life.)
Genius is a powerful word, but there's no reason to use it,
(The tricycle belongs to Stanley Kubrick, who spoofs two of his films as he enters the fray; he directed The Shining and 2001: A Space Odyssey. Having jumped in on Tarantino's next-to-last line, Kubrick says that Tarantino does not need to say the word "genius", in which he briefly explains why.)
'Less you're talking about the Kubrick, then there's really nothing to it.
(Kubrick states that referring to a genius in directing can only go with his name.)
Everything I do is visionary.
(Kubrick is considered by many experts as one of the best directors, with visionary works like his film adaptation of 2001: A Space Odyssey.)
Every single frame a painting made exactly how I wanna make it.
(Unlike some filmmakers, Kubrick claims his work is made just as he had in his mind when he comes up with his ideas. This also references his style towards the film Barry Lyndon, where every frame was adjusted and posed as to appear as a classical painting at first glance. This line is also a reference to Every Frame a Painting, a YouTube channel about film techniques. This channel helped inspire the battle, which was confirmed in a comment by the ERB channel on one of their videos.)
Do another take and get it right, 127 times!
(During filming of The Shining, Kubrick insisted that a particular scene between actor Jack Nicholson and actress Shelley Duvall had to be performed 127 times. It broke the world record for most retakes of a movie scene with spoken dialogue. He says that the other three directors should do another take on their raps, taking 127 takes to perfect them.)
I'll make you learn to love me! I'm the bomb, drop ultraviolent rhymes!
(Kubrick directed the film Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb, and he makes a pun on the movie's title by stating that he is "the bomb", or the best at his own talent, and he will make the other directors appreciate him.)
Like Clockwork, make you all hurt, beat Spielberg The Color Purple!
(Continuing from his previous line, Kubrick says he will drop violent rhymes regularly, like clockwork. This is also a pun on his movie A Clockwork Orange as it heavily demonstrates the concept of "ultraviolence" and Kubrick claims his rhymes is ultraviolence like the characters in that movie. When somebody gets beaten very hard, it will cause bruises, which are a bluish or purplish color. Kubrick claims he will beat every director with precision, and he mentions especially how he will beat Spielberg until his skin turns purple from the bruises. Kubrick also uses Spielberg's movie The Color Purple as a pun.)
A.I. is the worst waste of potential since the Ninja Turtles!
(Kubrick says that Spielberg's film A.I. Artificial Intelligence is as terrible as Michael Bay's adaption of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. A.I. actually began as a Kubrick film with a strong vision, but cinematography and computer-generated imagery was not advanced enough at the time. Kubrick eventually offered the project to Spielberg, who did not begin production until after Kubrick's death in 1999, and radically changed the original vision, causing it to lose its potential.)
That's enough! I've heard enough crap from all of you!
(All the other directors had dissed Michael Bay and his movies in their verses, so Bay says he has had enough with them insulting him.)
Why don't I come down there and show you what a real star can do?
(Continuing from Bay's previous line, since he thinks that the disses used against him were terrible, he comes down from his helicopter and decides to rap against the other four directors.)
I swoop low with the telephoto; no Bruckheimer, I work solo.
(A telephoto is a type of lens, and Bay is known to capture low-angle shots using such lenses. This type of shot is demonstrated during this line in the video. Jerry Bruckheimer is an action movie producer, with works like Pirates of the Caribbean and Top Gun. He has produced some of Bay's movies like Armageddon and Pearl Harbor. Bay says that he does not need any Bruckheimer's help, neither for films nor this battle.)
If there's one thing I've learned, bitch, this game is about mother fucking money!
(Unlike the other directors, Bay says that film-making is not about being the best critically but commercially.)
I make that dollar, y'all, mother fucking money!
(Bay's movies, especially the Transformers series, are commercially successful.)
Even make Mark Wahlberg make some mother fucking money!
(Mark Wahlberg is an actor who was in Transformers: Age of Extinction and Pain & Gain, both of which made a lot of money.)
I set up shop and got a few drops of that Got Milk money!
(Michael Bay directed the first "Got Milk?" commercial.)
Rose to The Rock, now I got that socks made of silk money!
(A reference to Pain & Gain featuring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, as well as the film, The Rock, which was directed by Bay. He says that his movies have made him so rich that he has enough to buy luxurious items such as socks made from silk. This may also be a pun on his previous line, as Silk is the name of a brand that makes milk alternatives such as soymilk and almond milk.)
I ain't got that guilt money! I don't give a fuck!
(Bay does not feel guilty of doing critically-panned movies nor does he care what others say about him.)
I take my checks to the bank, and I sign 'em with my nuts!
(Bay emphasizes that he has so much money that other people's opinions do not matter, to the point where he would go to the bank and sign checks with his testicles after profiting from his films.)
I give the people what they love, while the critics say I'm evil!
(Some of Bay's fans and general audiences don't mind Bay's movies, but critics usually pan his films. Many of Bay's movies use famous old franchises such as the Transformers and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, or use constant explosions, both of which many people like. Many critics despise Bay's movies and repetitiveness, and many dislike his renditions of the aforementioned franchises.)
Got no time to read reviews while I'm working on the sequel!
(Bay doesn't care about bad reviews, as he is already busy making the next movie of the franchise before the reviews can do anything.)
Got a gift from above and the eyes of an eagle!
(Bay says he was born with his "talent" of movie-making. Eagle Eye was also a movie Spielberg was an executive producer of.)
When it comes to blowing up, no director is my equal!
(Bay's movies are known and mocked for including a large amount of explosive special effects, but Bay takes this with pride, claiming no director is as great with explosions as he is.)
Well that was a close encounter of the turd kind
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "That was a close encounter of the turd kind.")
But there won't be a happy little ending this time
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "But there won't be a pretty ending this time.")
I'm the master…of suspense
No defense; Against Hitchcock once he presents. uh!
(These lyrics are what developed into the lyrics, "I'm the master…of suspense, so intense, no defense against Hitchcock once he presents! (Ahh!)")
You wouldn't be anything without me
(Hitchcock boasts that, had it not been for his influence, Spielberg wouldn't have worked in film.)
I'm the one who invented all your best techniques!
(Many techniques used in Hitchcock films have been redone and revised over the years, including in Spielberg's works.)
Fish puppets and Muppets to stir the fear up
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "C'mon! Fish puppets and Muppets to stir the fears up!")
I can squeeze screams from some chocolate syrup
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "I squeeze screams out of chocolate syrup!")
I'm enormous orchestrate a brilliant performance
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "My skill is enormous, orchestrate brilliant performance.")
You're as boring to watch as dialogue in Transformers
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "You're more horrible than Megan Fox's acting in Transformers!")
Here's the reveal: you may be worth billions,
(In film, a reveal is a final revelation of information that has previously been kept from the characters or viewers. Hitchcock uses this concept to tell Spielberg that he doesn't deserve most of the money he earns.)
But half that cash should go straight to John Williams
(These lyrics are what developed into the lyric, "Half your billions should go to John Williams!")
And not to put your pictures into black and white
(Many Hitchcock movies are in black and white, as was most elements of Spielberg's film Schindler's List. To put something in black and white means to officiate something in writing.)
But you did Schindler's List for free got paid for Amistad, right? Yikes.
(Spielberg donated his salary for directing Schindler's List to the Shoah Foundation out of respect of the friends and families of those hurt in the Holocaust. Hitchcock insults Spielberg for doing this for Holocaust victims but not doing anything like this for black men after directing Amistad, making a pun on Spielberg's pictures being put in black and white saying Spielberg is racist.)
I'm the best mamma jamma ever stood behind a cameras
(This lyric is what developed into the lyric, "I'm the best mamma-jamma ever stood behind a camera!")
Hitch put this mainstream (I'll DP E.T. post it on IMDB)
(Hitchcock brags about making the perfection of directing movies commonplace, or "mainstream". DP stands for "double penetration", meaning having sex with someone in two locations on their body. E.T. is a the titular space alien from Spielberg's E.T. the Extra Terrestrial. IMDb (International Movie Database) is a website dedicated to information about works of film, television, and video games. Hitchcock says he will "fuck up" Spielberg's work to a point where it can be considered a pornographic movie that can be posted on IMDb.)
- ↑ Wilson, Bee, "Alfred Hitchcock's Complicated Relationship with Food", London Daily Telegraph, January 25, 2013
- ↑ Liston, Enjoli, "Hollyweird - Alfred Hitchcock and Steven Spielberg", The Independent, October 2, 2009
- ↑ War of the Worlds retroview at Rotten Tomatoes
- ↑ California Milk Processing Board, "Who Shot Hamilton?", Retrieved from YouTube.