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Juliet Capulet

Juliet Capulet In Battle

Romeo & Juliet Title Card


Grace Helbig as Juliet Capulet
Character information
Full name Juliet Capulet
First appearance c. 1595
Romeo and Juliet
Born July 31–August 1 (age 13–14)
Physical description
Hair Blonde
Eyes Blue
Based on
Juliet Capulet Based On
Rap battle information
Appeared in Romeo and Juliet vs Bonnie and Clyde
Vs Bonnie & Clyde
Release date November 17, 2014
Votes on website 47%
Location(s) The Capulet Mansion courtyard
A moment's break from your gaze is an eternity past.
— Juliet Capulet to Romeo Montague

Juliet Capulet, alongside Romeo Montague, battled Bonnie & Clyde as a part of Romeo & Juliet in Romeo and Juliet vs Bonnie and Clyde. She was portrayed by Grace Helbig.

Information on the rapper

Juliet Capulet was created by William Shakespeare in his play, Romeo and Juliet. Juliet, daughter of political faction House of Capulet, falls in love with Romeo Montague, the son of rival House of Montague, at a masquerade party. They secretly get married, but Romeo is banished from Verona after killing Juliet's cousin, Tybalt, after Tybalt murders Romeo's friend, Mercutio. Juliet, distraught, goes against her father; then arranging her to be married to kinsman and suitor, Count Paris, against her will. She and a friar, John, then take part in a plan to reunite her with Romeo; faking her death to avoid the marriage and meet Romeo outside of Verona, but Romeo returns early. Romeo finds her "dead" body and kills himself over her, awaking her and finding him dead. She stabs herself in the heart, in the arms of her husband. The lovers' deaths teach both their families a harsh lesson which causes the end of their feud.

Lyrics

[Note: Juliet is in light blue, while Romeo is in regular text.]

Verse 1:

My love, your face is beauty to behold.

I will protect thine honor from these dust bowl dildos!

A moment's break from your gaze is an eternity past,

So together, we shall both put these bitches on blast!

En garde, thou artless beetle-headed flax wench!

The only insult you have thrust upon me is thine stench!

Why don't you twist upon these nuts? I hear you're good with a wrench!

The dismal state of your raps should be a federal offense!

(Haha!) And you there, wench with the neck of a chicken,

You'll get an ass-rippin' worse than your boyfriend's in prison!

You're not a true romance. You're just a conjugal visit.

Oh, but that's not even your real husband now, is it?

Verse 2:

Do you quarrel, sir? Ho, shall I draw my long sword?

Or will you duck your chicken-shit ass back into your Ford?

Verse 3:

No, no, my Romeo will beat your beau in contest blow for blow.

He will do upon thine dick what you hath done upon your toe!

[Bonnie Parker shoots Juliet.]

Oh, I am killed! What irony is this?

The lead role shot down by a failed actress…

Then I shall kill myself! On my stomach I shall lie,

So you louts can lick my ass! Thus, with a dis, I die…

Oops, never mind. My flesh was merely grazed.

Where's Romeo? Oh Nomeo! There's poison on your face!

Oh, happy dagger, pierce me true. Persuade my breath to stop!

Sheathe yourself inside my heart, and like the beat, I drop…

Trivia

  • Capulet is the first fictional female rapper in an ERB.
  • She is the second-youngest fictional character to rap in a battle, after Ash Ketchum.
    • She is the youngest woman to rap in a battle, at the age of 13–14 in the original story.
    • She is the third-youngest rapper to appear in general, after young Michael Jackson and Ash Ketchum.
    • She is the seventh-youngest character to appear overall, after Pleistarchus, Tootie Ramsey, Ash Ketchum, Ignorance and Want, and young Michael Jackson.
  • She is the first female character to die in-battle, and the seventh character overall to do so.
  • She, alongside Montague, is the third/fourth work whose creator is portrayed in another ERB, after Gandalf and HAL 9000.
  • She is the second rapper to not rap at all in a verse, after Bonnie Parker.

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