I'm not gonna let this battle be dictated by facts!
— Mitt Romney
Barack Obama vs Mitt Romney is the twenty-third installment of the Epic Rap Battles of History series and the eighth installment of Season 2. It features 44th and current President, Barack Obama against 2012 Republican Presidential Candidate, Mitt Romney, along with a surprise entry from previous President, and ERB participant, Abraham Lincoln. It was released October 15, 2012.
I'm not gonna let this battle be dictated by facts,
I'm rich! I've got fat stacks and super PACs,
We all know what went down in that 2008 election,
You're a decent politician with a winning complexion,
You're all Barack and no bite, been no change and we're all still hoping,
That you'll shut your mouth, but like Guantanamo Bay they're both open,
You're from the windy city, where you're looking pretty with your blowhards,
But come January, you'll be left evicted and with no job,
Raw rhymes stronger than my jawline when I spit a phrase,
Knocking you harder than front doors in my old mission days,
You see this silver spoon? This dug Mass out of debt,
Took you four years to drop unemployment down below 8%,
You feel that Barry? You're old news, everyone's having doubts,
And your rhymes are as weak as this economy that you've done nothing about,
Call me a vicious business man cause Romney's stealing this race,
I'll go Bain Capital on your donkey ass, restructure your face!
They say your father was a great man, you must be what's left,
Need to stop hatin' on gays, let 'em teach you how to dress,
You've got the momma jeans and a Mister Fantastic face,
So rich and white, it's like I'm running against a cheesecake!
Republicans need a puppet and you fit,
Got their hands so far up your rear, call you Mitt,
I'm the head of state, you're like a head of cabbage,
'Bout to get smacked by my stimulus package (ahaha),
You're a bad man with no chance, you can't even touch me,
I got four more years (two terms) in the White House, just trust me,
I hoped you saved your best rhymes for the second half,
Cause right now, I'm 47% through kicking your ass!
Whatever, that 40% thing got you real mad,
What, did it remind you how many decent parents you had?
Uh, look, I respect all religions, uh, but it might get crazy,
If the White House has a first, second, and a third lady!
Ha! Don't bring up wives, man! What are you doing?
You got hitched to the female version of Patrick Ewing!
Uhhh, let me be clear, uh, don't get it twisted,
We'll see how pretty your face is after my fist has kissed it!
Ahhuuhhaa...you're a stuttering communist!
Oh yeah? Well you're stupid!
By the power invested in me by this giant bald bird,
The President shall not be the shiniest of two turds!
You! I wanna like you, don't talk about change, just do it!
I fought for what was on my brain until a bullet went through it!
And you, moneybags, you're a pancake, you're flip-floppity,
It's a country, not a company you can play like Monopoly,
I'll properly reach across the aisle and bitch-smack you as equals!
Of the people, by the people, for the people!
So far, this is the longest rap battle in ERB history. The video is 3 and a half minutes long, with Rasputin vs Stalin being the second longest with 3 minutes and 38 seconds, but the battle is shorter than this battle.
This is the second battle to have a third-party rapper (Lincoln), the first one is Steve Jobs vs Bill Gates, and the 6th overall to have more than two rappers.
This is also the third battle to have a character who has appeared in a battle before rapping.